Maya Jama, what a revelation! I didn't even know who she was before Celebrity Traitors season two. I'm not a Love Island fan, so she'd somehow managed to pass me by completely. But blimey, she's one hell of a good Traitor. And an even better liar. I think we have another potential winner.
I don't think I've ever watched someone lie quite so effortlessly as Maya Jama. She can quite literally look another contestant straight in the eye and tell an absolute whopper. And it looks so effortless.
And the confidence! Not a flicker of guilt. Not a bead of sweat. Just Maya, casually convincing everyone she's as innocent as a freshly washed choirboy.
Meanwhile, I'm sitting on the sofa shouting at the television because I know perfectly well what she's up to.
Naturally, I decided she deserved her own Christmas card.
Maya Jama Christmas Card: Maya Days Be Merry and Bright
“MAYA DAYS BE MERRY AND BRIGHT.”
Yes, it's a Christmas pun. No, I'm not apologising.
For this card, I've illustrated Maya wearing a Traitor's green cloak and holding a lantern. She looks perfectly composed, which seems appropriate for someone who can apparently tell a barefaced lie without so much as disturbing her eyelashes.
I've given the traditional Christmas greeting a little Maya makeover. It's festive, cheerful and just suspicious enough for anyone who's been glued to Celebrity Traitors.
And unlike the people sitting around that Round Table, at least you know exactly what you're getting.
See the Maya Jama Celebrity Traitors Christmas card.
A Funny Christmas Card for Maya Jama Fans
If you've got a friend who loves Maya Jama, watches Love Island or has become completely obsessed with Celebrity Traitors, this might be just the Christmas card for them.
It's my own original illustration, professionally printed as a physical 7 × 5-inch Christmas card with a glossy finish and a brown kraft envelope.
Each card costs £4.
You can order one to write yourself, or I can handwrite your message inside and send it directly to the recipient. The handwriting is included in the price.
And if Maya isn't your favourite suspect, I've also illustrated James Acaster, Romesh Ranganathan, Michael Sheen and several other familiar faces from the castle.
View all my Celebrity Traitors Christmas cards.
These are my own unofficial, independently illustrated Christmas cards inspired by the programme.
Written and illustrated by Simon Stratford, type designer, graphic designer and someone who now knows exactly who Maya Jama is. Follow my illustrations and occasional attempts at animation on Instagram @itsmesimonok.